I spent some time developing a new sport. I call it Rug-Lick Cricket, also known as Rugby Gaelic Cricket. THE RULES AND CONDITIONS ARE THE FOLLOWING:
The game is played using various conventions, some of which are from the three sports.
1) The aim of the game is to score runs.
2) There are 7 players to a team, one team of which bat, the other field.
3) The batters must not move. If they do so, they will be considered offside, and the ball must be bowled again.
4) The bowlers must not "chuck" or the ball, or run with it. If done so, a penalty will be given.
5) When the batsmen receive the ball, they must kick the ball directly upwards with their foot (regardless of ball speed), and then try and smash the ball as far as they can.
6) Fielders are permitted to randomly run onto the pitch and tackle the batsmen for no reason.
7) If a fielder fumbles, a dummy half will take place (whatever that means).
8) During the dummy half, batsmen are permitted to throw their bats randomly into the air, and hope that they hit a fielder. This allows the batting team to acquire an advantage, due to medical treatment of the injured player.
9) There are various other small things involved:
- If a batsmen gains 97 runs, they will be awarded a Rugtury (Century (100 Runs) in Rugby Terms)
- Performance enhancing drugs are permitted, since no effort is ever made to ban them completely.
- Causing controversial stuff is a great way to involve this sport in the media, therefore it is encouraged.
Sorry if fans of these sports were offended while reading this post, but it had to be done.